"I'm so double digits, yo."

Not the words I expected to hear as we pulled overgrown henbit from our paltry excuse for a flower bed.

"You're not yet, technically." I said.

"Oh, but I am. In my heart. Because it's only a few months. You just probably forgot because you've been double digits for a really long time."

Ouch.

You're changing, my girl. I know it's good, I know it's normal, I know I can't stop it. But I'm not ready for the double digits.

The way you've been acting, it seems the digits you're approaching have a 1 and a 6 instead of a 1 and a 0. You look at me now, with anything but admiration in your eyes, when I make you do things you don't like to do. Getting up in the morning, brushing your teeth, cleaning your room, going to church.

Going to church.

You spent the first 45 minutes of church this morning growling and scowling at me. Arms crossed. Lips pursed. Eyes narrowed. You slammed the missal back into the pew, refused to make the sign of the cross and did your best to throw a tantrum without making a sound.

This moment in time scares me, my girl.

Because I grew up with 5 girls and I know how double digits can change a girl. I know how emotional, how sensitive, how loud, how quiet, how mean and how confused they can be. I wish I knew how to navigate our road ahead as a mom, but I don't. Your brothers haven't prepared me for girl double digits. 

I'm not ready. But in this moment, you don't care. 

Because you are, yo.

Inspired by Stream of Consciousness Sunday (#SOCSunday). The concept: set a timer, write for five minutes, publish. Brain dump style, no editing. Publish. Share. Link up at Jana's Thinking Place and check back there for next week's theme. This week's is 'Moments in Time.' Pics taken post-henbit pulling morning, Saturday, 4/13/2013.