I've been trying to write an 'ABC's of Me' blog post for almost 2 weeks now. Have been trying to work on my One Little Word assignment for the same amount of time. I'm failing.

If you go to any seminar these days the speaker will likely tell you that there is no such thing as try; we either do or we don't. We make time for things that are important, things that make our heart sing, things we want to do for one reason or another.

I beg to differ. As I glance over at my schedule, I see that I'm making all sorts of rookie mistakes. Written in pencil (means I'm not committed enough), not planned enough (means I'm reactive instead of proactive), precious little time for me (I've written about this before, but don't have the energy to go back and find something to link to). 

That schedule–and those entries–are what's keeping me too busy to think or do the things I want to do. Blog. Walk. Yoga. Bake. Breathe, even. Yes, I know that's melodramatic. I breathe. Really, I do. But all those other things that make it hard for me to stop smiling? Their blocks got erased and overwritten by something that was productive, something that (hopefully) will bring revenue, something that I need to do.

This is a good problem to have, when you think about it. I'd rather be in a state of overwhelm–and so excited about every possibility, every opportunity, every unknown around the corner, than to be uninspired. Bored. Drab. So I am thankful that the phone continues to wring, and the clients continue to refer, and the work continues to pile up. Because I'm hoping for an inverse relationship between the pile of work and the pile of bills, so that eventually I can breathe just a bit easier.

My real challenge is the time it takes to do things, and that's what this 'doing it all wrong' calendar is teaching me. It takes time to write. It takes time to create a facebook page. It takes time to craft an article. I knew that before, of course, but I didn't really get it. And I didn't charge accordingly. Now comes the realization that other people follow my lead; if I don't value my time, why should anyone else?

This isn't just a client thing. It's a kid thing. It's a Lisa thing. It's an ongoing struggle, a battle I keep losing and a plan I keep changing.  But since the A word in my not-yet-published ABC's of Me post is 'adaptable', I'm thinking it will all work out just fine.